"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood..."

Went to Walmart the other day, just wandering around all those aisles. Looked like I was looking for something, but in fact, I didn't. Just wanted to walk, just wanted to be aimless, purposeless, careless for a moment in time.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not sad, I'm not depressed, I'm not gloomy or anything like that. I just can't make up my mind about what I really want. Vanilla or chocolate? Pink or blue? Coke or Pepsi? This school or that school? A long road or a shortcut? Now or the future? Bravery or cowardice? Following other people or drawing my own path?

What can I say, those questions keep popping up in my head. I've always tried to be careful and mapped out plans for things. But plans don't work out right away as they're crafted; it takes a lot of research, revision, and evaluation to update the plans. And they still don't work. Then plan B, plan C, plan D come along. Now another question arises: Which one is the best?

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could..."

It is just me that I always have to be in the know zone of what I'm doing. If I buy a new machine, I will read the manual from front to back to make sure I get it right the first time. If I order a service, I will sit down and read the service agreement word for word to make sure I know what my rights are. Yep, I "make sure" everything is in perfect order before I do anything.

But life is not in perfect order. Life is unpredictable, chaotic, and full of surprises. So sometimes I have to close my eyes, take a guess, and step forward. Dare I? Dare I make the bet when my future is on the table?

The Road Less Traveled - Robert Frost